


Family Pictures 1

by Stacy LA Stronach (slashgirl)



Series: Family Pictures [1]
Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Drama/Romance, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1997-07-10
Updated: 1997-07-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 05:48:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slashgirl/pseuds/Stacy%20LA%20Stronach
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim and Blair make a startling discovery.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Family Pictures 1

**Author's Note:**

> My take on Jim's saying his mother was "gone" is that she'd left the family. If she were dead, I think he'd have come right out and said so. I could be wrong. As well, I've never heard his parents names' mentioned on the show, so I've chosen my own, and assumed that as the eldest, Jim may share names with his dad. I also don't think he mentioned how old he was when she left, nor the age difference between Stephen and him, so my numbers are guesses. Jim's description of how his father raised the boys is my basis for making him the bastard that he is in this story. (g) The theory I talk about with regard to autism is one I heard several years ago on Donohue (or one of those); I have no idea if it's still considered valid, but it works for my story. My knowledge of divorce law and law in general is quite low, so forgive any factual errors.
> 
> Current note: This was written before Jim's Dad was intro'd on the show, so yeah, Jossed. (Maybe before Jossed was even a thing?)

1997, Blair Sandburg's Office 

Sadryna Cameron paused outside the office of her fellow graduate student, Blair Sandburg, and looked at her watch. She was half an hour early for her meeting with the man and wasn't sure if he'd be there or not. As she was about to knock, the door was opened by a tall, rather handsome man, with brush cut light brown hair, and sky blue eyes. He looked at her and nodded curtly, brushed past her, then paused, staring at her intensely. 

When his eyes met hers, Sadryna felt a shock of ... electricity? No, it was more like recognition, but she knew she'd have remembered meeting someone as imposing as him. However, she couldn't shake the feeling that she knew the man. 

Jim Ellison looked at the young woman, wondering if he knew her, she seemed familiar. Maybe one of Blair's old flames? No, he knew they'd never actually met, but she reminded him of someone, he just couldn't place who. She was a beautiful woman, with almost waist length light brown hair, her eyes almost as bright blue as his own. She was a couple inches shorter than Blair and certainly had an attractive figure. 

Blair watched them staring at each other, feeling his jealousy starting to surface. Jim was _his_, and he didn't care if this was that pheromones thing again, he was not sharing his lover. Clearing his throat, he said, "Hi, can I help you?" 

When he spoke, Sadryna looked at him, and Jim continued on his way down the hall. She had to smile at the look of possessiveness and jealousy in Blair's eyes. "Yeah, I'm Sadryna Cameron, I'm supposed to meet with Blair Sandburg." 

"That's me, man. Hey, it's great to finally meet you," Blair said, his attitude softening somewhat, as he reached out to shake her hand. 

She took his hand, and thought, *Hmmm, this one is definitely more my type* as she looked at him. He was a little taller than her, with shoulder length, dark brown curly hair and the most gorgeous blue eyes she'd ever seen on a man. He had the most kissable mouth, and a nice compact body, and...*Whoa, down girl, it's a pretty sure thing this one's taken*. "Nice to meet you, too, Blair, after all those phone conversations, it's good to finally put a face to the voice," she replied, *and a gorgeous face it is* she thought, as she sat down in the only other chair that wasn't piled high with papers. "Who was that guy who was leaving?" she inquired. 

Blair sent her a narrow look, "That was my lover, Jim Ellison, why?" 

Laughing, Sadryna replied, "Don't worry, Blair, you're more my type than he is. I was just wondering, cus I could swear I know him, but I'm sure I've never met him. Weird, huh?" 

"Yeah, kinda. You said you were interested in looking at some of my Burton monographs?" Blair asked, ignoring her comment. 

Sadryna studied Blair, considering how much she should share with him, how much she could trust him. "I kind of misdirected you on that, Blair, what I really wanted to talk to you about is your research on Sentinels. I didn't want to say as much over the phone and make you think I was doing research in the same area, but I have a... a private interest in this." 

"A private interest? What do you mean by that? And just how much do you know about my research?" Blair questioned, not quite trusting this woman. 

"I know that you're doing your dissertation on Sentinels, and that you're studying one, one with all five senses. As to my interest, let's just say I know someone in a similar situation." 

"You know a Sentinel? How many senses does he have heightened? And how did you find out what I was doing?" 

"Professor Sondheim is an old friend of my father's, and he's aware of my interest in this area. And _she_ has all 5 senses heightened, as your subject does." 

Blair stopped to consider what she'd said. "Cool, man, that would only be the second case I've heard of where the subject has all 5 senses. What can you tell me about her? How long have her senses been active?" 

"She's 26, and her senses have been active since she can remember, which is about age 1. At age 3, she was diagnosed with autism, with her hearing so sensitive, she basically withdrew within herself, so it wouldn't hurt. I think you'd call it `zoning'. Her parents sent her to a specialist in Europe, who worked with autistic kids. His theory was that many autistic children have a heightened sense of hearing, that everyday noise levels are tortuous sounds for them. That their way of dealing with it is to withdraw into themselves, much as she did. The specialist helped her learn to control her hearing and by the time she was 5, he considered her cured. She applied what he taught her about controlling her hearing to the rest of her senses. She had some problems when she hit puberty, the strength of her senses almost doubled, but she used the lessons she'd learned earlier in life to help herself. Her son, who is less than a year old, also appears to have all 5 senses on-line." 

"Wow, man. That is like _so_ cool! Her son is a Sentinel as well? Man, this could really make my study interesting, do you think she'd agree to let me observe her as well?" 

"Actually, I know she's not interested in being a research subject, nor will she allow her son to become one. She has a life to lead, and really doesn't want any attention drawn to her abilities." 

Blair was a disappointed with this news, but he thought that if he could just meet her, he might be able to talk her into it. "Do you think I could meet with her, man, I'd love just to be able to talk to her. Could you arrange that, please?" 

Sadryna thought for a moment, then sighed. "Look, I'll give her a call, see if she'll have dinner with us tonight, okay? But I can guarantee that you won't be able to talk her into letting you study her, Blair." 

"I just want to talk to her. What makes you think I'd try and talk her into letting me study her, anyway?" Blair asked, trying for the innocent look, and failing, miserably. 

"Oh, I don't know, Blair," she replied, smiling. "Look, if you could give me a couple minutes alone, I'll give her a call right now and see if she'll come over for supper, okay?" 

"Sure thing, go ahead," Blair replied, getting up and leaving his office, to wait outside the door. 

Dialling her home number, Sadryna simply told her housekeeper/ nanny, Mary O'Donnell to expect two extra people for dinner. "You can come back in, Blair. She'll be there." 

"What time should I show up?" 

"How's six sound? And why don't you bring Jim along? Make it a date!" Sadryna said, winking at Blair. "Look, Blair, I've gotta run, I've got an appointment with David MacKinnon over in Celtic Studies, so we'll see you guys at six, okay?" she said, as she handed him a card with her home address on it. 

"Oh, yeah, Sadryna, we'll definitely be there. See ya then," Blair replied. 

Summer 1968, The Ellison Household 

Cathryn Ellison packed everything she could into her two large suitcases, her tears almost blinding her. *God, I hate that bastard, for what he's making me do. For what he's doing to Stevie and Jimmy.* Her husband, Joe, was forcing her to leave, and he wasn't letting her take _his_ sons, that was certain. She didn't have to hurry, but she was, the sooner she got this over with, the better. Joe had left to go be with the boys who had been visiting with his parents for the past two weeks, and had told Cathryn she'd better have her stuff out of his house by Monday, because whatever was left, he'd burn. She grabbed the photo albums, unsure, but then decided to take them, Joe had slides of most of the pictures anyway. She had just about worked herself into a frenzy, when her best friend, Stella Cameron, grabbed her by the arms, making her stand still. Stella and her husband, Michael, were helping Cathryn to move her stuff, in fact, she was going to be staying with them until she could get back on her feet. 

Stella looked into her friend's brilliant blue eyes, and spoke, "Cat! Calm down, breathe, love, breathe. We've got more than enough time, okay?" 

Taking a couple deep breaths, pushing her light brown hair away from her face and wiping the tears from her eyes, Cathryn looked at her friend and nodded, "Yeah, I know, but this just hurts so much. I mean, I can't even say goodbye to my boys. Damn that bastard to hell!!" 

"I agree, but once you're out of here, we'll look at trying to solve the other problems, but we have to concentrate on this right now," Stella said firmly. 

Michael came back in, looked at the last few boxes and asked, "Is this everything, Cathryn?" 

"Yes, it is," she said, sadly, as she walked out of her home for the last time. 

Later that afternoon, Cathryn sat nude in front of the vanity in the guest bedroom of her friends house. She studied her body, noticing that the bruises were finally starting to fade, although she still had one hell of a shiner around her right eye. *This is all my own fault* she thought, as she remembered the past few weeks. 

She'd started an affair with her next door neighbour, a young Hispanic man, Juan Carlos Garcia, about 3 months ago. At first, they'd had to sneak around, a night here, an afternoon there, but when the summer had started and the boys had been sent to stay with Joe's parents for a couple of weeks, as they did every summer, the affair had intensified. Carlos worked the nightshift at a factory, and with Joe at work all day, the lovers had started spending their afternoons together. Which had worked wonderfully, until last Tuesday, when Joe had arrived home early, and discovered the two of them in bed together. 

Joe had hit the younger man several times, then literally threw him out of the house, throwing his clothes behind him. Upstairs, Cathryn had locked the bedroom door, and was trying to get dressed, she'd never seen Joe that angry, she was scared. She heard her husband come back upstairs and he rattled the door handle. "Let me in there you bitch!" he said, in a barely controlled harsh whisper. 

"No, Joe, just go away, calm down. We'll talk about this later!" 

"We'll `talk' about it now, Cathryn!" he screamed as he kicked the bedroom door in. 

Cat turned around when she heard the wood splinter and couldn't believe the rage she saw on her husband's face, and was now truly terrified. She tried to get past him, to escape, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her back, throwing her onto the bed. She cried out when she felt the first punch, but after the first few blows, she just lay there, knowing there was no way she could fight back. 

When he stopped, he'd said, "I want you out of here, Cathryn. Today. Get your stuff together and get the hell out. A whore like you isn't fit to raise my sons." 

She'd packed her bags, and called Stella, who had come over to get her and allowed Cat to stay with her. As she sat in front of the mirror, she knew Joe would make sure, some how, that she never saw her sons again, and that he'd almost certainly try to make the boys hate her. *Was it worth it Cat? Was it worth losing your sons?* she asked herself. 

1997, Sadryna Cameron's house 

Jim followed Blair up to the front door of Sadryna's house, smiling at his young lover's enthusiasm. Blair was so hyped about meeting this woman, he was almost bouncing as he walked. "You know, Chief, it's a good thing I know why you want to meet this woman, or I might be jealous." 

"Hey, she might have the whole package--a Sentinel and pretty, man, who knows?" Blair teased. 

"I better be the only `package' you're interested in," Jim replied, giving Blair's ass a hard pinch. 

"Oww! Man, that hurt!" Blair exclaimed, as he rang the doorbell. 

Mary opened the door, "You must be Mr. Sandburg and Mr. Ellison, please, come in. May I take your coats, gentlemen?" she said, as they took their coats off and handed them to her. 

Leading them into the dining room, Mary said, "Sadryna will be with you in a moment," as she left the room. 

"Man, this is one nice house," Blair commented, as he sat down at the table. Then he noticed that there were only 3 places set. "Damn, I hope that Sentinel woman didn't cancel, man, I'm gonna be so disappointed." 

"No need to be disappointed, Blair, your `Sentinel woman' is here," Sadryna said, as she walked into the room, her young son settled on one hip, her arm around him. "Hi, you must be Jim, I'm Sadryna Cameron, it's nice to `meet' you." 

"Yeah, it is, Sadryna. And who's this little fella?" Jim asked, reaching over to tousle the baby's hair. 

"This is my son, Jacob. Would you like to hold him?" 

"Sure, why not?" Jim replied, taking the little guy in his arms. 

Sadryna pulled the high chair over next to her chair and sat down, as Jim put the little guy into his high chair. 

Blair was just sitting their, staring at Sadryna, trying to get over his surprise. "You're the Sentinel? Why didn't you just tell me? Oh, man, this is like so weird." 

Laughing, Sadryna replied, "I didn't know you. Still don't actually, but my instincts tell me I can trust you. That's why I wanted to meet with you." 

Jim spoke up, "You can trust him, Sadryna, I do. Of course, you don't know me either, but...I'm the one he's doing his dissertation on, and I trust him." 

After dinner, Sadryna took the men into her library as there were some books she'd mentioned to Blair that he was interested in looking at. 

As Blair and Sadryna discussed some references in an old Celtic text that she thought might refer to Sentinels, Jim wandered around the library, looking at the paintings and other books. He stopped in front of the fireplace to look at the photographs, one was of Sadryna and Jacob, that looked like it had been taken shortly after the child's birth. There were pictures of her with her parents at various ages, and as Jim looked at them, he thought her mother looked familiar, but he couldn't place her. Then his eyes fell on something that made his gasp. It was an old black and white picture, of a young woman with two small boys, and Jim recognized the photo. He had the same one at home, in his photo album. It was a picture of him, his brother, Stephen, and their mother, taken at the beach, when he was 8 and his brother 5, two years before his mother had left them. He looked at the pictures of Sadryna's parents again, and knew why he recognized her mother. It was his mother, but she was older, and had dyed her hair red, which was why he hadn't recognized her right away, after all, it had been almost 30 years since he'd seen her. 

Jim was so focused on the pictures, he didn't realize Sadryna had walked over to stand next to him, until she spoke. "Looking at the mugshots, huh?" 

Jim's emotions were in turmoil, as he looked down at this young woman and realized why she'd looked familiar to him earlier that day--she looked very much like her, no, make that _their_ mother. Still unsure of how he felt about this, Jim asked her about some of the other photographs, before pointing out the black and white one, and asking her about it. "Who are those people?" he asked, trying to be casual. 

"That's my mother, with my older half-brothers, Jimmy and Stevie. I've never met them, they're from Mom's first marriage," she replied, sadly. 

Jim asked about a couple of the other photos, then inquired, "Sadryna, are both your parents alive?" 

"No, I just have my mum, Dad died 4 years ago," she replied. 

Jim let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, "I'm sorry to hear that, it's hard to lose a parent." 

Before Sadryna could reply, Blair called her over to look at something he'd found in one of the books. Jim stood there, trying to sort through his tumultuous emotions. He didn't know how he felt about this, how he was supposed to feel. This could mean a chance to see his mother again, after all these years, but did he really want to, after all, she was the one who'd left their family, for no apparent reason... 

Late Summer, 1968, The Ellison household 

"I'll race you to the house, Jimmy," his little brother yelled, as the boys got out of the car. 

"No way you'll win, Steve," Jim answered, as he took up the challenge. They arrived on the front porch at the same time. "You didn't win!" 

"Yeah, well, neither did you! Mommy, we're home!" Stephen called out, as he went in the front door, his brother right behind him. 

"Mommy, where are you?" Stephen called out, again, running towards the kitchen, looking for his mother. Jim stood in the doorway to the living room, looking around, knowing that things were missing, and realizing that those things were items he associated with his mother. A porcelain statue of a ballerina that her mother had given her when she was a little girl, the pictures of his maternal grandparents, which were normally on the China cabinet, gone as well. Jim had a bad feeling about all this, and when he turned around to go outside and ask his father, he saw the man walking in the door. 

"Stevie, Jimmy, come here, please," Joe Ellison ordered his sons, taking them into the living room. Before they could ask him anything, he spoke. "You're mother's left us, boys, she left while you were away." 

"Why'd she go away, Daddy?" Stephen asked, his voice quavering, tears starting to gather in his eyes. 

"Because she hates all of us. She never loved me, or either of you, if she had, would she have left us?" Joe answered. Noticing Stephen's tears, Joe grabbed the little boy by the shoulders, shaking him. "Men don't cry, Stephen, so act like a man, not like a little girl! See, your brother isn't crying, why are you? Why can't you be more like Jimmy?!" he hollered at his youngest son, indicating Jim's stoic stance. 

Jim had learned early in his young life that tears were not tolerated by his father, that Ellison men never cried, not even if they were in physical pain. 

"Will we ever see--" Jim started, but was cut off by his father. 

"No. And neither of you will ever mention your mother again, as far as this family is concerned, she's dead. Do I make myself clear, boys?" 

Both boys said, "Yes, sir!" 

"Now, let's get out there and start unpacking the car. I want you to take your things upstairs and put them away, immediately," Joe ordered. The boys obeyed their father, without question or hesitation, they knew better. 

Jim had just finished putting away the last of his clothes, when he heard the faint sobbing coming from his brother's room. *Good thing Dad's in the kitchen making dinner, cus if he heard Stevie, he'd come up here and really give him something to cry about.* Jim thought, as he crossed the hallway to Stephen's room. He walked in and saw his brother lying on his bed, his face buried in a pillow to mask his crying. Sitting beside Stephen, Jim reached over and started rubbing the boy's back, and stroking his hair, as he'd seen his mother do so often. Stephen sat up, and whispered thru his sobs, "Can I have a hug, Jimmy, please?" 

Jim didn't say anything, just pulled his sibling into an embrace, providing as much comfort as he could. He was surprised when he felt the tears rolling down his cheeks, he hadn't wanted to cry, but he couldn't help it. He couldn't believe that their mother would just up and leave them like this. 

Both boys were so focused on their pain, they didn't hear Joe come upstairs, didn't know he was there until he spoke, "For God's sake, no wonder your mother left, with two snivelling little boys like you. Stop your balling, wash your hands and get downstairs, supper's ready." 

As the boys got off the bed, Jim was sure they weren't the reason their mother left, they couldn't be.... 

1997, The Loft 

When they arrived back at the loft, Blair watched as Jim hung his coat up, then went over and sat on the couch. Jim hadn't said two words on the way home from Sadryna's, and Blair was worried, he knew something was wrong, but getting Jim to talk to him was as difficult as pulling teeth sometimes. Blair walked over and looked down at his lover, who was sitting there, staring, not at what was outside but at what was inside himself. He straddled Jim, his hands going to either side of the other man's face, forcing him to look up at him. Blair smiled as he felt Jim's hands come up to rest on his hips, and leaned in to brush a chaste kiss across his lover's mouth, before asking, "Jim, what's wrong? You haven't said two words to me since we left Sadryna's." 

"Oh, love, it isn't you. It's me, I've found something out, something that I really have to think about, before I can talk to anyone about it. Even you. And before you complain, I am _not_ shutting you out. I just need time to...`process it' as your mother would say. Okay? I will share with you eventually, Blair, but right now, I need time." Jim replied, looking into the blue depths of his lover's eyes. 

Blair returned the look and thought he saw pain in the sky blue eyes, his curiosity was roused *What could Jim have found out at Sadryna's that would upset him so?* and was about to pester Jim to tell him what was wrong, but something in the man's eyes, the look on his face, made him stop. Jim had said he'd tell him, so Blair would have to trust that he would. "Okay, Jim. I love you." 

"I love you, too, Blair," Jim said, as he moved his hands up under Blair's shirt, across his back, pulling him closer, seeking that mouth for a kiss. Jim sighed as he felt Blair's lips against his, their mouths opening, their tongues seeking each other, gently caressing. As Blair trailed kisses along his lover's jawbone, Jim moved a hand up to twine his fingers in that lovely curly hair. Moaning as he felt Blair suck on his earlobe and start to rub their erections together, Jim lost himself to the sensations, *Oh, God, I need this tonight, need to lose myself in him, forget everything else*. When he felt Blair starting to undo his shirt, Jim said, "Let's take this upstairs, baby. I need you." 

Both men sighed as Blair moved off of his Sentinel, then took his hand, leading him upstairs to their bedroom. Once there, they quickly divested themselves of their clothing, and Jim gently pushed Blair onto the bed, lying down on top of his lover, claiming his mouth for another passionate kiss. Jim pulled out of the kiss, sucking on Blair's lower lip as he did so. He kissed his way along the younger man's jawbone, up to his ear, sucking the lobe into his mouth, tonguing the earrings there, then blowing gently across the ear, making Blair moan. Making his way slowly down Blair's neck, sucking and nipping, Jim focused on the taste of his lover, enjoying it as he always did, that faintly spicy tang that was `Blair'. To keep from zoning on taste alone, Jim also listened to the breathy moans that Blair made. Jim had to smile, normally Blair was constantly talking, encouraging him, telling him what he wanted. Tonight he seemed to recognize his lover's need to love him quietly. 

Jim slowly kissed his way down to one of Blair's nipples, which he sucked into his mouth, grazing it with his teeth as he released it, then sucking on it again. He smiled as he felt Blair's hands grab a hold of his head, fingers digging into his scalp. He moved his mouth to Blair's other nipple, repeating the process, listening to his lover moan, and feeling the young man writhe beneath him. Jim made his way down to Blair's raging hard on, gently licking the tip of his cock, tasting the pre cum there, before sucking the head into his mouth. Blair thrust his hips up, seeking that warm cavern, wanting his cock to be inside. Placing his hands on his lover's hips, to hold him still, Jim slowly deep throated his partner, moving his mouth up and down Blair's shaft, until he felt the younger man's come spurting down his throat, and heard the sharp cry of Blair's release. 

As Jim moved up to kiss Blair, he reached over to the nightstand to grab the lubricant. Opening the tube, he spread some on his fingers, then used them to prepare Blair for him. Blair pulled his knees to his chest, giving Jim better access and once Blair started thrusting back against his fingers, Jim applied lube to his erection, then slowly entered his lover. Jim moaned as he was enveloped in Blair's hot, tight channel, and Blair moved his legs up over Jim's shoulders, allowing Jim to go deeper. 

He stroked gently in and out of his lover, noticing as Blair's cock started to harden again, so reached out to stroke him. Jim lost himself in the sensations he was feeling, the smell of his lover's arousal, the small whimpering and groaning sounds he was making as Jim fucked him, the feel of Blair's skin as he touched him and the feeling of being inside this man, the man that he loved. 

Jim knew he was getting close to orgasm and as he felt Blair come again, he thrust one last time, as the spasm of Blair's muscles took him over the edge, and Jim cried out his love's name as he came. Sighing, he withdrew from his lover, collapsing on the bed beside him. Blair reached over, and pulled Jim into an embrace, with the older man's head on his shoulder, wrapping his arms around him. "I love you, so much, Jim." 

"I love you too, Blair," Jim murmured, as both men fell into deep, dreamless sleep. 

Jim rolled over and looked at the clock, groaning inwardly, it was 4 in the morning and he knew he wouldn't get back to sleep. He looked at Blair, who was sprawled across the bed, and gathered the younger man to him. Blair didn't even wake up, just cuddled closer to him. Jim's mind was going a thousand miles a minute, there was so much to think about. He had a half sister, his mother was alive, what was he going to do about it? He started stroking Blair's hair, and felt himself calm down a little bit, he always found that relaxing, feeling the silky strands glide over his fingers. *Hmm, they say if you own a pet, petting them helps reduce stress--maybe this is related?* Jim thought to himself, and smiled. He didn't think his lover would appreciate that particular analogy. Although he did have those "puppy-dog" eyes that he used, when he wanted Jim to do something he wasn't particularly eager to do. 

When Blair woke up a little while later, he found himself in Jim's embrace and could feel his lover stroking his hair. He sighed, he could stay like this forever, no complaints. Moving up, he kissed Jim, "Morning, lover, how long you been awake?" 

"Oh, about an hour. I've been thinking, about yesterday, and what I found out. Sadryna is my half-sister," Jim said, quietly, waiting for Blair's reaction. 

*His half sister, and she's a Sentinel and her son is, this means it's hereditary and--* Blair shut off the scientist part of his brain, he could think about that later, this was not what Jim needed right now. "Your half-sister? Through your mother, I take it? How did you find out?" Blair asked. 

Jim explained about seeing the pictures at Sadryna's house, and how he thought he'd recognized her when he saw her at Blair's office. 

"So, is your mom still alive? Are you going to see her, Jim?" 

"Yeah, she is, and I have no idea if I'll go to see her, I mean, it's been almost thirty years, and...I just don't know, Chief. I'm going over later today, to talk to Sadryna, and tell her, she seemed interested in knowing her brothers. This is just so much, so much to deal with, and I don't know what to do." 

Blair didn't say anything, just hugged his lover to him, trying to comfort him. 

Jim sat at his desk, trying to concentrate on his paper work, but found himself constantly glancing at the picture he'd taken out of his photo album. The same one that Sadryna had on her mantle. He'd tried to get in touch with his brother, Stephen, who was on a business trip in Eastern Europe, but he hadn't been able to reach him. Of course, the phone service over there was unreliable at the best of times, so Jim hadn't been that surprised. Knowing he wasn't going to get any work done, Jim decided to go and visit Sadryna, after all, she did have a right to know. As he drove over to her house, he thought about what it was going to be like having a sister, and a nephew. He also wondered if he would see his mother again, he still hadn't decided on that, there would be issues to work out on that one. 

Jim rang the doorbell, and Mary answered the door. "Good day, Mr. Ellison, can I help you?" 

"Um, ya, is Sadryna home?" he asked. 

"Yes, please, come in. She's in the library," Mary said, as she led him into the other room. "Sadryna, Mr. Ellison is here to see you." 

"Thanks, Mary. Would you like something to drink, Jim?" Sadryna asked. 

"No, thanks," Jim said, waiting until Mary left, then continued, "I need to talk to you." 

"I hope I'm not in trouble with the police, Jim," she teased. 

Jim flashed her a quick smile, "No, no. This is personal business," he said, seriously, as he took the photo out of his jacket pocket, handing it to her. 

Sadryna gasped when she saw the picture, then looked at Jim, her eyes full of amazement and joy. "You're Jimmy?" she squeaked, then she hugged him. Surprised, Jim hugged her back, he hadn't been sure how she'd react. "Oh, gods, Jim, if you only knew how much I've wanted to meet you, and to finally find you," she said, happiness in her voice. "What about Stephen? Do you know where he is? I'd love to meet him as well." 

"Well, Stephen's on a business trip to Eastern Europe right now. I tried to get a hold of him earlier, but I couldn't. I really don't know how he'll react to all this, Mom's leaving hit him harder than me. Actually, we just started talking to each other again after 15 years," Jim answered. 

"What happened? If you don't mind me asking, I mean 15 years is a long time." 

Jim explained what had happened with their father, the car, and his brother. Looking at his sister, Jim asked, "Sadryna, did our mother ever tell you why she left us? I mean Dad always told us that she hated all of us and/or Stephen and I were such horrible children, that she left. I never knew whether to believe him, I mean Mom never tried to see us after she left, so..." 

"Oh, Jim, you boys were never the reason she left. Did she hate your father--yes, but not you two," Sadryna replied, seeing the pain in his eyes, and hearing it in his voice. She reached up to stroke the side of his face, and hugged him again. "Yes, she did tell me what happened, a few years ago. I assume you'd like to know? What?" she asked, curiously, when Jim smiled at her. 

"When you touched my face like that, it brought back memories, I remember that Mom used to do that, to comfort us," Jim answered, "And yes, I'd like to hear the story." 

She led Jim over to the couch, and sat down beside him, holding onto his hand with both of hers, and taking a deep breath, started. "It was 1968, and Mom started having an affair with a neighbour. Your father walked in on them one day, I guess while you boys were visiting his parents, and he beat the man up, then went back up and beat Mom up pretty bad. He kicked her out that same day, telling her that `a whore like you isn't fit to raise my sons'. She went to stay with my Uncle Michael and Aunt Stella, well, I wasn't around then, but they ended up being my aunt and uncle. Michael is my father's brother and Stella is Mom's best friend." 

Jim interrupted her, "Why didn't she go to the cops about the beating?" 

"Jim, think about it. It was '68, back then domestic abuse was a `family affair'; the only time the cops got involved was when somebody ended up dead. So, that wasn't really an option, they would've said she had it coming for cheating on her husband. Thank the gods, things have finally started to change. Anyway, Joe gave her a week to get her stuff out of the house, and he'd already started divorce proceedings. He brought the papers over one day for her to sign, when my uncle wasn't there, he was her lawyer. Mom signed them, but what she didn't realize was that he had her sign an agreement stating that she wouldn't ever try to see you or Stephen again. My uncle tried to get it nullified, but it was iron clad. Your mother didn't want to drag you boys thru the whole court thing, so she didn't fight it. After all, she was an adulteress, and didn't stand a very good chance of getting custody, let alone visitation rights. Although, she did sneak over a few times, to watch you when you were out on the play ground at your school, but she didn't dare approach you, in case you told your father. And she did go to both of your high school graduation's, and she took me with her to yours. I don't remember much, I was only 5 at the time, and had just arrived home from the institute in Europe. Believe me, Jim, she hated herself for what happened, and has always blamed herself, and she knew Joe would do everything in his power to convince you boys that she hated you. Looks like she was right," Sadryna concluded, sadly. 

"Yeah, I guess when you're told something often enough as a child, you end up believing it. Why didn't she try and find us after we were adults?" Jim asked. 

"She was scared, Jim, scared that you guys would reject her, and she couldn't get over that fear, the more time that went by, the more frightened she became. After she told me her story, I tried to convince her to find you, but she wouldn't, she was so damn scared, hell, she wouldn't even tell me your last name--she didn't want me to find you either, as much as I would've liked to," she explained. 

"You've said that a couple of times, that you wanted to find us, and you seem so happy to finally know me. Why is that?" 

Sadryna laughed, "Well, Jim, I was an only child, and I always wanted to have siblings but after Mom had me, she refused to have any more children. I remember Daddy telling me that when she was pregnant with me, she was terrified that she'd have another son, and was so relieved when I was a girl. He said that she felt that having a boy would remind her too much of what she'd lost and she wouldn't have been able to handle that. Although I think Mom's a lot stronger than she gives herself credit for. So, you see, my motives are entirely selfish!" 

Jim had to laugh, he figured he was going to like having this young woman for a sister. "That's okay, most of what anyone does in life is motivated by selfishness, isn't it. Oh, dear, that makes me sound rather jaded, doesn't it? And you should be careful what you wish for, you might get it, cus you've got me for a brother, and I'm no bargain." 

Sadryna sighed, and said, with a twinkle in her eye, "Well, I guess it's better than nothing, isn't it? But seriously, Jim, I'd understand if you weren't comfortable having a relationship with me, I mean, the circumstances and all..." 

"I learned my lesson with my brother, Sadryna. Life is too short to throw family away. And I've never had a sister. I'd really like to get to know you, and my nephew. I like the fact that I'm an uncle, it's kinda weird, but I like it," Jim answered. 

"I'm so glad, Jim, this is just so wonderful," Sadryna said, as she hugged him, again. "Oh, gods, Jim, I've been hugging you all over the place, and I don't even know if you're comfortable with that." 

"Oh, trust me, I don't mind." 

"Jim, are you, I mean, do you, um, want to see Mom?" Sadryna hesitantly enquired. 

"I don't know, yet Sadryna. So much has happened, and, I'm going to have to think about it for awhile. I just don't know," Jim answered, pain darkening his eyes. 

"That's all right, I understand," Sadryna said. "Take all the time that you need."  
  


* * *

Email the author with comments.  
Use your browser's back feature to return to your story selections or start a [new search](http://b-b-t.mit.edu/SXF/cgi-bin/senslash/storysearch.cgi).


End file.
